Showing posts with label INFJ. Show all posts
Showing posts with label INFJ. Show all posts

Teacher Style: How Being an Introvert Helps me be a better Teacher

Monday, April 23, 2018

Skirt: Thrifted | Shirt: Forever 21 | Shoes: Charlotte Ruse | Bag: Target | Earrings: Forever 21


I don't think I first realized when I chose Education as my minor how hard it would be for me to work up the courage to be in a classroom with students and interact with other teachers? Sometimes, as an Introvert I tent to hide behind my personality, making it a barrier that keeps me from taking risks and getting outside of my comfort zone, and with that I often loose the opportunity to grow. Just being in college, going to class every day, and being an RA was a stretch, but I learned how to survive as an Introvert and even thrive in the midst of uncomfortable and hard situations. 
Being an Introvert is powerful, but it can often times become an excuse or a crutch to some (myself included). It takes more courage, pep talks, and deep breaths on my end to achieve something that others can easily go and do in the blink of an eye without thinking about all the people, factors, etc. As an Introvert I have a unique since of the world, but I also have a hightened awareness for everything that is going on and working out the logistics for things ahead of time.......It can be a blessing and a curse:)
Someone on Instagram recently asked me if I had any tips for being an INFJ and a teacher and I thought I would take her up on explaining what I have learned along this crazy and amazing journey!

As a teacher (substitute and future teacher) being an Introvert is my biggest strength, but also my biggest weakness......I know, that is contradictory (but INFJ's as people are constantly a contradiction already). I say this because through being an Introvert (specifically an INFJ) I have a unique since of my surroundings and how I see the world. As an INFJ I am titled as an "advocate" because we see things in the world we want to fix, latch onto something in order to change how things are done, and seek to make a difference by inspiring others....that is an INFJ's inspiration for life, but also what makes a GREAT teacher. However, being an Introvert means we can be drained by people, business/stress of life,and confrontation.....also in the job description of being a teacher. 
Thus, being an Introvert can be one of my biggest strengths because I am passionate, want to engage and inspire students, pour positivity into their life and constantly think outside of the box to get students involved. Not only that, but many Introverts and INFJ's are Highly Sensitive Persons (HSP). I wouldn't necessarily call myself a 100% HSP, but I definitely fall into the 50% range. With this I am often hyper aware to things that are happening, the way people are feeling, and notice things that others disregard. As a teacher I have learned that I often notice the quiet students on a daily basis. Maybe it is because I can relate to them (I was them in school) or maybe I see them as having untapped potential that no one knows about. I always notice the kids walking in the hallways holding books, the kid who sits in the corner of the classroom working alone, and the students who are wrapped up in their own world of art and stories, blocking out the loud kids around them. I often call these students "the invisible" because I don't think many other students or teachers notice them or their uniqueness, but I love that I know who they are without even talking to them. Being an INFJ is a strength because I see how I can change a classroom, student ideas, perspective, work ethic and engagement, and when I get freedom in classrooms that is exactly what I try to do. However, being an Introvert as a teacher can also be one of my biggest weaknesses!
I don't necessarily say that it is a weakness that cripples me with fear and inadequacies which keep me from being successful, but it takes soooooo much more work and courage on my end to put into practice all of my ideas and engage with students and teachers. The teaching comes naturally, but the courage takes some work (and pep talks & LOTS of prayer). I also internalize EVERYTHING....all of my emotions so I can easily develop anxiety and tension in my shoulders that doesn't make life fun. I remember when I first started my Methods internship before student teaching (I was in a classroom with higschoolers 2 days a week) and I had to learn to walk through the hallway of crowded students, greet them at the door, interact with them, and positively keep them on task. I had to kind of learn to be an authority figure, but in a good way, and that took some work. That semester was hard, because I had to learn to stay confident (or at least look confident) around high schoolers and teachers (even if I might be kind of freaking out on the inside). However, that feeling didn't last forever! Once I got to know the students and teachers it got easier. The same can be said about my student teaching. This time I was in the classroom with students Monday - Friday. The first week at each of my placements took some getting used to, and took copious amounts of courage and deep breaths, but after the first week I found my place. I made connections with students and they began to accept me, and I was blessed by amazing mentor teachers who encouraged me and made me feel like I belonged! While the teaching atmosphere isn't always the most comfortable for me, I have to remember I didn't necessarily choose teaching for my own comfort, but rather because of the opportunities I have with students. 
As I moved out of student teaching, graduated, and started subbing I tackled a new challenge in being the TRUE authority figure and teacher in the classroom. Many times I subbed for my past mentor teachers so I knew the students, but sometimes I was walking into unfamiliar classrooms with students who were strangers. Subbing was definitely more of a challenge as an Introvert because I had no mentor teacher to lean on and guide me, it was me and a class full of students. It could be hard at times. but through my time in methods and student teaching I had experience and knew my potential. I knew I could be the cool, welcoming, nice teacher, who could enforce classroom management, but I could also be someone to lay down the rules and walk around the room keeping kids on task.
Teaching and subbing as an Introvert (and INFJ) is hard because many times the situations I find myself in go against what my mind wants to be comfortable. I have to STRETCH and CHALLENGE myself every time I get in my car to drive to a job or step into a classroom and being around that many people can be draining (so when I get home I usually hide away in my room for an hour). Despite the challenges it can bring up, it has made me a stronger person. So yes, being a Introvert can be a weakness, but when it comes to what truly matters at times it is my biggest strength and I don't think I would change it! 

Are you a teacher?
What is your biggest challenge as a teacher?
Can you relate to any of the things I have learned?

-Madison 

Surviving College as an Introvert

Monday, November 27, 2017


Looking back on college I am constantly surprised that I survived in a sea of people! I knew college would be a stretch for me, but I don't think I knew quite how much of a stretch until I moved in and it all became a reality. The strange thing about my personality and college is that when I started I only knew I was a quiet and shy person, but I hadn't yet discovered what that really meant for me. I didn't yet know the expanse of what it meant to be an Introvert and that the word "Introvert" completely captured every emotion and feeling that went on in my head. 

Through being at college I not only learned so much about myself and what I was capable of, but I learned so much about my personality, specifically what it meant to be an Introvert (INFJ) in a heavily "peopled" place and how to survive in a sea of people. 

As an Introvert (if your are like me you can relate) we are people who thrive being alone, doing things by ourselves, dislike talking to people we don't know, and avoiding social events or large groups of people at all costs! So looking at a college campus from an Introverts perspective EVERYTHING basically goes against what we are feeling, thinking, and saying in our mind. Let's see, there are dinning halls with many students every day, you sit in class surrounded by 30-50 strangers, you are put in groups to work on projects with classmates you don't know, everyone around you is involved in clubs and organizations, the "thing to do" is go out on Thursday nights, football games are a common occurance for college students to be surrounded by fellow students yelling and cheering at the top of their lungs, tailgates are tradition, and on campus events draw crowds of students who are usually just there for the free food and Tshirts.......did I miss anything? College for an introvert is everything that makes us uncomfortable, anxious, stressed, and retreat into ourselves. 

So how does an Introvert survive? I think for me, the thing that helped me survive as an Introvert was discovering myself. I discovered who I was, learned about my personality, and came to realize that the way I was feeling was perfectly normal for 26%-50% of the population (and the 1% of us INFJ's). I learned that my need to be alone was normal and I accepted that as a part of myself. When I accepted who I was through my personality, it made me feel more at ease in a world that could be a bit overwhelming & crazy. Fore example, I remember taking a book with me to breakfast and lunch every day my first semester.....there isn't anything quite as nice as dissapearing into a book while surrounded by people, it gives you your own world to thrive in and I loved that. I even continued this book reading tradition into my other semesters and even started bringing a book with me to class and reading while I was waiting. 

Looking back at college, I am still dumbfounded at the things I did! Knowing so much about my personality now I always wonder if I were to go back, would I be as sucessful as I was? Sometime I think being so naive about my personality for so long helped me push myself beyond my comfort zone? Other times however, I think it was the recognizition of my personality that actually helped my push myself beyond my comfort zone to try new things (like become an RA). 

Whatever the case, I believe the one thing that helped me survive college as an Introvert was accepting who I was. Being in a world of people who were constantly doing things, constantly meeting new people, going places, and being involved with clubs an organizations, I learned to accept that I wasn't like everyone else. Sure, I eventually became an RA and got involved with my staff team as well as an on campus small group and Bible study, but beyond that I was just me. I didn't go and do all the "things" the "typical" college students did, but I was okay with that. 

I had discovered a few years before starting college that I was different than a lot of people my age, mainly because of how I dressed. However, as the years went by I discovered that wasn't my only difference from other college students. Not only were my views of relationships, fashion, modesty, language, actions, and hard work different, but my view's of "fun" were to.....it was confirmed (as I had already known) that I was VERY old fashioned! 

Call me a grandma, crazy cat lady, whatever you want, but for me those terms encompassed who I was and the way I spent my time outside of class (or in class)...LOL:) With that, I had one Best Friend in college who I met my first day (she was a blessing & God send) and she was also an Introvert so we did a lot of stuff together whenever we were not in class. Honestly I don't know what I would have done without her? I think we would both agree that we would have become hermits if we hadn't met, so it's a good thing we did. 

That's the second thing that helped me survive college as an Introvert, having someone that understood me. Not everyone understands Introverts, but fellow Introverts always understand (for the most part) and that helps you feel like you are not alone. Most days I was perfectly fine going back to my room after class to study, or staying in on Thursday nights with a movie and Icecream, or traveling home on the weekend, but when I was feeling like I should probably talk to another human, she was always the person I turned to. We had standing lunch dates during the week and always had a schedule we stuck to so we knew when we would see each other and when we both needed time alone....it was great! 

So here's my GRAND takeaway.........embrace who you are! You know the Dr. Seuss quote "why fit in when you were born to stand out!" that is 100% how you should approach college as an Introvert. If you spend your time trying to fit into the typical "college life" and "college routine" that everyone else falls into when they go to college you will find yourself lacking, feeling disconnected, loosing yourself, and probably having a severe case of anxiety or panic attacks, so don't do it to yourself! As an Introvert we view the world differently, and therefore college for us is a whole new world in itself, but it is a world we have the ability to thrive in and conquer. BE YOU! Embrace your quirks, habit, and nights in, because that is who you are! Find someone who understands you, you don't have to have a TON of friends, all you need is one and you will both be there for each other when you need it! 

While college was a HUGE STRETCH for me as a person and as a Introvert, I wouldn't change the experience because I learned so much about who I am. Because of my experiences in college, I know why I feel the way I do at parties with tons of people I don't know. I understand why staying at home in my room with my cats and a movie or a book is my favorite pastime. I can laugh and make fun of the fact that I only ever went to one football game in college and didn't live your typical college life. However, embracing me, embracing my introverted personality is one thing I am proud of and will forever make me a more confident person (as odd as that sounds).

Were you an Introvert in college?
What were your tips for surviving college as an Introvert?

-Madison 

10 Things You Should Know About Introverts

Wednesday, August 16, 2017


A few months ago I stumbled upon a facebook page called Introvert Dear, where they share various articles and writings about Introverts, Highly Sensitive People, and all of us quiet types:) I seriously can't get enough of their articles every time I run across one, and I have honestly learned so much more about my personality (they totally get me)! In the past I have been very vocal on the blog about my personality, and like I have shared before, I am an INFJ which makes up only 1% of the population, and while my introverted personality differs from other Introverts, there are a host of similarities in our lives that we share and that bind us together. 

I think sharing about who we are, opening up, and being vulnerable (for me that's in writing) allows us to show a different side of us to people. I know a number of bloggers who have shared about their struggle with depression, eating disorders, etc. and I always love and admire that they are so honest about who they are. Therefore, being vocal about my personality is something I am passionate about and I will never get tired of sharing that side of me on the blog. 

With that being said, reading articles and reflecting back on life and relationships, I have come to realize how misunderstood we as Introverts truly are. I have had people say that they didn't like me at first, ask if I am always this serious, mention that I am a very quiet person, or jokingly ask if I ever have fun. It is with that realization that I have decided to write up a list of 10 things you should know about introverts if you are friends with one, are an extrovert, or totally don't know anything about this personality. However, let me be clear to reassure you that I am not writing this post from a negative mindset or to point fingers at anyone (friend or family) but simply to shine a light on the complicated inner workings of an introverts brain:) I hope that by reading this you will learn a bit more about the Introverts among you! 

  1. NEVER assume that we don't like you or that we "hate" you (true words from past experience)! Okay....so we might be super serious when we first meet you (or even if we have known each other for years), awkward, and not say much, but give us time and make an effort to talk and start up a conversation or keep it going....please don't put everything on our shoulders. If you make an effort you will find that first impressions of Introverts are wrong 99% of the time! We really don't hate people....contrary to popular belief.....so give us a chance (or a second chance).
  2. You might make social interaction and outside get togethers a high priority, but we as introverts prefer to spend time alone, get chores or homework done, or finish a project we have been working on. This happens because we tend to see life very logically and often assess everything that needs to get done in our life (tackle that to do list), so most often we choose school or work over social settings because those are important to us, and when we don't have school or work to do we might just need time to recharge. 
  3. Don't let our sometimes "hermit" like nature fool you, we really do want to get together with you or get to know new people but we don't want to bother you by making the first move, sending the first text, or sometimes starting the conversation. We often feel like we are bothering people by texting first and we hate to be a nuisance, so when you get the chance reach out, because chances are we were actually thinking about you! 
  4. With that being said, if we say NO when you ask us to do something it doesn't mean you should stop inviting us. Keep reaching out and offering the invitation and one day we will probably come. However, don't be forceful or pressure us in your invitation, be understanding about our personality, and maybe even ask us "what would you be up to doing?"
  5. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, give us at least 24 hours notice about things! If you want to go do something don't text us an hour before that outing and expect us to excitedly say yes. Sure, we might say yes, but in these cases that's rare because we don't have adequate time to prepare or even get ready and we really won't be in the best frame of mind. So the next time you want to go out to eat, see a movie, visit a friend, or get together to watch a movie text us the day before....or better yet let's set up a plan 3 days before:)
  6. We like being around groups of people sometimes (our hidden talent is people watching), but if we are still getting to know each other let's grab coffee together instead of going to a party or hanging out with a large group of people! WE prefer to get to know people and open up more in one on one situations, over group settings. Same goes for if we are catching up with old friends after a few years. 
  7. In regards to group settings, don't expect us to act like everyone else and freely mingle....in fact, if you tell us to go mingle at an event we will want to crawl under a rock. We will probably just end up standing near a table by ourselves, drinking 4 glasses of water just so we have something to do, smile at everyone who passes by, but never work up the courage to initiate conversation. So if you see us standing there looking uncomfortable because of all the people (or because we just drank 4 glasses of water) just say hello!
  8. Plain and simple we aren't known to have a lot of friends, but I'm not saying that in a negative or depressing way. We prefer to have a handful of close friends over a slew of acquaintances. We function this way because it allows us to cultivate true authentic friendships over surface level friends......honestly we really do dislike fake people so if you "pretend" to be our friend we are going to see right through the mask and the two of us will never be close. 
  9. We will probably think differently than you 100% of the time! We like details and all the information up front so that we can meticulously think through every scenario and option determining what is best before we commit to something. When we go into something blindly we are going to get stressed out, so we are the students who send our teachers (or professors) emails like 3 times before the first day of class and then send them multiple texts or emails throughout the semester...LOL! 
  10. Most people's saying might be to "let loose and live a little," but for us that just causes undue stress. So when it comes time to being spontaneous, we really do hate it most of the time! Stretching beyond our comfort zones or control is not something we like to do, and again we are going to think through all the details and if it doesn't seem logical we won't want to go along with it. 
Do you fall into the Introvert category?
How do these 10 things align with your personality?
Do you have a friend who is an Introvert?

-Madison 

Outfit: Introversion & College

Monday, September 12, 2016

Shirt: Luella
Skirt: The Skirtery
Jacket: Target
Shoes: Target
Sunglasses: Five Below
Scarf: Vintage
Watch: Sam Moon

I have mentioned frequently on the blog that I am an introvert and to be honest, it shouldn't come as much of a surprise considering that a majority of bloggers (or at least the ones I follow) are moderate to severe Introverts; that is why blogging is such a HUGE part of who we are. With that being said, while I have mentioned my personality many times on the blog I haven't ever really talked about what it means to live as an Introvert, especially in relation to Introversion and college. 

Whenever I think about the fact that I am in college, my Junior year no less, I can't help but always get this feeling that I have done the impossible! I don't know why I always feel that way, but maybe it is due to the fact that being in college is such a HUGE STRETCH for me? Granted, most days I am completely fine, but when I realize that I live away from home (on my own), am surrounded by hundreds of strangers, daily am in situations of "people overload," and now with my job, most days I must talk to people I don't know, it always seems like I am living a life that I never knew I would be able to. 

Crazy thing is, I never realized that I was an introvert until maybe my Junior year of high school. I always just thought I was a quiet and shy person (which is true) but I didn't know that there were actually specific personality types that went along with these traits! Therefore, when I finally realized this I took a test and found that I was an INFJ (the 1%) which means I am 85% Introverted, 69% Intuitive, 69% feeling, 93% judging, and 81% assertive. Realizing that there are different types of personalities, and especially different levels of Introversion definitely helped me understand myself more and how my mind works. 

College has been a complete game changer for me and has done some crazy things to me as an Introvert. Two semesters ago I applied to be a Resident Advisor (RA) up at college. The crazy thing about my applying to be an RA, was that the job entailed me to basically be an extrovert with my resident, or at least when carrying out my duties. I knew that when I applied, and I truly believe it was the idea of a challenge that inspired me to go through with the crazy plan. Even more astonishing was that I received the job just a few weeks later and was asked to start immediately instead of waiting till the next semester (which meant no formal training). Talk about jumping in HEAD FIRST!

 Being an RA has completely changed my life....in my job position there are many times where I can become very extroverted, especially now that I am closer with all of my my co-workers. Its crazy to see all of the people that I have met and grown closer to all because I took a leap of faith on a challenge and did something CRAZY! The funny thing is that as an RA, most days I will be walking across campus, or to class and see people I know and actually say "hi" to them because I KNOW PEOPLE NOW at college (did you hear that mom!). 

Some days I love the idea of meeting new people and talking to them, and then other days I go to BIG college Bible study parties and think...."Man, I am such an Introvert who is WAY out of her comfort zone!" But you know what, that is Ok! It is Ok to have days where I am out of my comfort zone because life isn't perfect and its often all about pushing ourselves beyond our boundaries to achieve something GREATER, and even in those weird situations, I always leave learning something (in the instance above I learned that college guys are absolutely CRAZY and completely immature.....but at least I will live longer with all of the laughing). However, even when I am out of my comfort zone and need to recharge, there is freedom in taking time for myself (or an entire weekend) in watching Netflix, reading a good book, single Goodwill shopping dates, Target runs, and lots of coffee to refuel my Introvert levels.

College life as an Introvert is a struggle at times, but it is a struggle and journey that has taught me sooooooooo much about myself. It has taught me that challenges are good things and that they help me grow. It has taught me that when I put myself out there to do something that is sooooo "not me" I will actually be more successful than I think. It has taught me that I actually CAN meet new people and make more than 1 friend in college and go to lunch with them, go to Bible studies with them, talk and just hang out. Sure, I still need days for myself, and I might avoid grabbing lunch at the dinning hall sometimes because #people, but I have grown to love the opportunities I have had to grow. I never would have been able to fathom all that has happened to me in college, much less everything I have been able to accomplish as an Introvert, but it has been totally worth it! 

With all that being said and with the times I am challenged to be extroverted, I am still 100% an Introvert, through and through, and proudly wear my Introvert Girl Gang shirt because we have to stick together! As an Introvert (if that is you) you are unique. People might not always understand who you are (ok, most always) or realize that you need time to recharge and reasses life, but always remember that you really can do things that you never thought you would! Sometimes you just have to take a deep breath and jump into a challenge! Challenges are good for us, and if you take them every once in awhile you will grow and learn more about yourself and your abilities.

Maybe that is one reason that style means so much to me? As a reserved and introverted person I tend to say that clothes sometimes talk for me (you wouldn't believe what comments I have gotten from people) and also boost my confidence so much (check out Jessica Boyer's Latest Post on outfit confidence)!! Specifically this ensemble, because it says soooooo much about who I am: classic, with a little sass, a pop of pink, and a LOT of coffee....PLUS you can't forget about the all to IMPORTANT "Introvert Girl Gang" tee which sums up who I am and gives me LIFE! I actually wore a similar combination of this look for my first day of class and I love that in wearing it I let everyone know "whats up"............I'm an introvert and I'm going to EMBRACE it!


Any of you Introverts stretch yourself in school?
Are you part of the "Introvert Girl Gang"?

 -Madison


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